Once again my happiness has been melted away by the rays of the burning BalaBoy.
I’d nearly forgotten about him, after 3 weeks of not speaking, until he suddenly text me last night.
‘I’m sorry if I upset you. I didn’t realize how much you liked me. I still like you though.’
Well, that makes it all ok, doesn’t it BalaBoy? You still like me? Well that’s a shame, as you’re such a b*****d.
But of course that wasn’t the end of it. No, not when we’re talking about this donkey.
‘I’d never hurt you on purpose and what I said to you wasn’t true.’
‘What wasn’t true?’ His ‘other woman’, that’s what.
Yes, he never liked another girl – he used her as an excuse to ‘not get too close to me, because of our situation’.
Well why couldn’t you have just told me straight? I mean, that’s just sick. SICK. Who does that?
My reply to him: ‘Well f**k you. F**k bloody you.’
‘I knew you wouldn’t understand.’
Um, what?!?! He’s screwed up as HELL this guy.
But I need to talk to him, as he’s screwed up MY head in the process of screwing his own.
I broke down in tears tonight as I asked him why he just decided to text me like that.
‘I felt bad over what I said.’
‘And it took you 3 weeks to realise it?’
‘I’ve been busy.’
Hahaa, I bet you have, you d**k.
‘I’m gonna go now, I’m depressed.’
Oh are you now? I tell you, this guy’s got a face and a half.
So now, I don’t know what to do.
I’ve asked him to call me so that we can talk, but he hasn’t even replied to the text.
And I need to talk to him. As much as I dislike him at this very moment, I need to talk to him.
But while doing this I’m feeling too pushy, and I want to hold back but I can’t because my head is rolling about the place; my tears are being switched on as if by a remote when I see a post of his on my Facebook Home page and I just cannot do something without thinking of him.
He doesn’t know how much he’s actually messed me up. Internally; emotionally.
And I’m not even a grown-up yet.
That’s screwed up.
Well, this is such a lovely, up-beat post, isn’t it?
I thoroughly apologise that my life can be an utter mess sometimes.
And when I say utter, I mean UTTER.
On the good side, CurlyGirl + Tinted have been such amazing friends as they’ve just cheered me up, and made me forget all about him when I’m with them. I really thank you for that 🙂
So, I’m listening to David Bowie with sad eyes and annoying everyone with my problems.
Oh, life’s a female dog alright.